My Word for 2020
It's the end of a decade and I'm looking back at the past 10 years. The good, bad, the ugly, the mistakes, the blessings... the list goes on. I spent a lot of the last 10 years figuring out who I am, where I'm supposed to be, and what I'm supposed to do.
I don't have it figured out. But I've grown significantly and learned a lot about myself in the last decade that only comes with experience and a whole lot of trial and error. (If my family is reading this, you know the last 10 years have been wild).
Something else I've realized as I'm reflecting over the last decade is I've wasted a lot of valuable time on people. People who were fleeting "in the moment" friends, and people who did not make me a better person. The saying goes "you are the company you keep" and I'm realizing I don't want to be like some of those people. So-called friends who are unsupportive, shallow, and fair-weather friends don't add value to my life and I will not surround myself to people who do not make me want to be a better human being.
All of this to say, my word for 2020 is
I aim to be intentional in everything I do:
The time I spend working
Projects I work on
How I choose to spend time with family
Friendships I keep
This isn't to say I won't have a frivolous moment - of course I will. But by consciously being intentional in my actions and choices, I will be in control over my mood, my time, and what I really find value in.
Intentional with my Work and Time
Being a work-at-home-mom means I juggle a lot of tasks regularly. It also means I have become a professional multitasker - make lunch while listening to a meeting, feed the baby while running workshops, draft articles while I fold laundry, the list goes on. This doesn't include school carpool, grocery shopping, playdates, and planning fun activities with the girls.
By being more intentional, my goal is to set clear working hours so I can focus only on the girls during working hours (of course, there are exceptions!) and then work while the girls are napping/in school/in bed/having quiet time. My time is precious & I refuse to miss out on the girls being little because I mismanaged my time.
Keeping intentional friendships is important. My girls know who is around, who cares, and who is valuable. I cannot risk them losing a "friend" or someone they get attached to if I let too many fleeting friendships into my life. In this new decade, I want to surround myself with people who encourage me, support me, love me, and make my life better, and people to whom I can return the love.
I've lost friends to new boyfriends, petty behavior, or simply just entering new phases of life, but I believe friendship is a two-way street. If I take the time to reach out and suggest a coffee date, or try to stay in touch and get nothing in return, then it is a waste of my time. Yes, my feelings get hurt and I immediately start to assume I did something to make them mad at me - but here's the thing: If someone constantly makes you question if they're mad at you - they. are. not. a. real. friend. Read that again.
You want to have intentional friendships - then take them offline. Meet in real life. Have coffee. Let the kids play together while you sit and have a grown-up conversation. Make time for them, even when schedules get busy. I only see some of my closest and dearest friends maybe a handful of times a year - but we make an effort. And that is worth it.
Intentional Projects & Partnerships
I get emails almost regularly from brands wanting me to help promote or partner with them - and I turn a lot down. Brands that don't align with my personal brand or beliefs do not get to take up time in my life. I want to deliver purpose and meaning to anyone who lets me take up their time (online & offline) and I really cannot do that if I half-heartedly promote something I don't truly believe or buy in to.
There are companies and businesses that I have worked with that understand I'm a mom, understand where my priorities lie, and fall within my branding as a busy mom. I'm all about that. And in the upcoming year, I'm going to be more intentional in who I work with and what I help promote - more family focused things, kid-friendly activities, and things I believe in.